Sunday, 29 June 2014

Perspective


I am 22 years old and last year I had a sort of reality check when some I knew died. They were the same age as me and without going into too much detail they died suddenly. Now we were not close in fact we hadn’t spoke in years, but it was a shock and made me think nonetheless. All the clichés of wasted life and much too young uncontrollably filled my thoughts. It was almost like a moment of clarity for me, if I felt indestructible before I now felt fragile. This person died in an accident which may make you think that from now on I’d be more cautious with a sense of “if it could happen to them then it could happen to me” but I didn’t feel like that, I felt that I needed to do more with my life as it could be over at any moment. This is probably the kind of thing I’d hear some else say and call bullshit, but its true. This whole thing had a touch of chaos-theory about it, something that should have been rather insignificant to my life ended up making me contemplate the way I live and even more the way I think.
It’s an odd one really as I often think how much this may of impacted me if this person and I had of stayed in touch and been friends. Who knows how crazy this would have made me then, I’d probably have become a vegan or a Buddhist and spent my days doing yoga and drinking kale smoothies. Instead I have a try everything sort of attitude, I want to try everything and do anything that pops into my head. I think this probably has something to do with my newest desire to want a motorcycle after all “it’s the things that you don’t do that you regret”. Errr that cliché left a horrible taste in my mouth, I’ll have to remember not to do that again. In fact looking back this whole thing is full of clichés, oh well it cannot be helped lets move on.
To be perfectly honest I’ve always had a sense of do what you want/do what makes you happy. I’ve certainly never done anything I haven’t liked/wanted to for long. But this event certainly backed that up for me. I believe that if you live like this you will be happy and get to where you want to go in life. aut viam inveniam aut faciam.